Parenting a school-aged child is a big responsibility. Along with managing school, activities and social schedules, you’re tasked with supporting your child through one of the most important times in their lives.
It’s a big task, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Understanding this unique developmental period — and what to do if your child is struggling — is the best way to support your child’s well-being. Below, learn more about your child’s mental health, and what steps you can take to be there for your child as they grow.
Mental Health Concerns Are More Common Than You Think
If your child is struggling with big emotions or unwanted behaviors, it’s easy to think you’ve messed up somehow as a parent. In reality, that’s rarely the case. Mental health issues, even in school-aged children, are more common than you think — and they can affect kids with the most attentive parents. If you feel discouraged, reframing your thoughts can help. Rather than telling yourself you’ve messed up, try to remind yourself that you’re a supportive, loving parent because you noticed your child may need extra support and pursued it.
Early Intervention Is Important, but It’s Never Too Late
As a caregiver, you are the expert on your child. Just as you would with a physical health issue, try to address mental health symptoms as early as possible. Reaching out for support when you have a concern is one of the best ways to ensure the best possible outcome with your child’s emotional health. Still, late is better than never. It’s never too late to ask for help when you or your child need it, so don’t hesitate to reach out to your child’s pediatrician for support.
{1CA5FF98-497B-499D-A5FA-D0F4B1C429A7}
Typical Development Can Contribute to Unwanted Behaviors
Ages 6 to 12 include a lot of major developmental milestones. At 6 years old, your child’s brain is changing, so it may be hard for them to regulate their emotions. And at age 8, their brain changes again, which may lead to new, frustrating behaviors. Then, as your child approaches the pre-teen years, their emotions may become more complex — resulting in moodiness or increased outbursts.
During this time, children begin to compare themselves to others and may start to feel self-conscious or embarrassed about how they look or how their body is changing, especially as they are starting to enter puberty. With the start of puberty, there may also be an increase in anxiety, depression, and irritability. Children develop at different times, so it can be more common for them to feel different compared to their peers.
As difficult as it can be to navigate the twists and turns of your child’s development, remember your job is to provide a safe space for your child to express their emotions — and the tools to manage them. Offering validation for how they are feeling and providing encouragement can be a great way to provide support (“I understand you may be feeling worried, would you like to talk about it?”). Remind your child that their body is changing in a lot of ways and it is common to feel uncomfortable, but you are there to help support them.
Changes in Baseline Can Mean It’s Time to Ask for Help
Emotional outbursts, moodiness and social conflict can be normal parts of your school-aged child’s development. But you should also know when your child may need a bit of extra support from you or a professional.
Pay attention to changes in your child’s baseline that last more than a few weeks. Concerning behaviors are typically completely out of the ordinary for a child. In children with anxiety or depression, you may notice changes in eating or sleeping habits, or a lack of interest in normal activities. For example, a child who usually enjoys school may suddenly get poor grades on assignments, or a social child may start withdrawing from friends and family.
Your Child’s Pediatrician Is Your Best Resource
If you think your child may be struggling, their primary care provider is the best place to start. Pediatricians are experts in child development. At Children’s Wisconsin, we understand that a child’s mental health is just as important as their physical health. That’s why we take a comprehensive, family-centered approach to care. At all Children’s Wisconsin primary care offices, behavioral health consultants work alongside our pediatricians to support the mental and behavioral health of children from infancy through young adulthood.
Along with providing strategies and tools to support your child through their school-age years, we can help you determine whether your child’s behavior is age-appropriate or a sign they may need a bit of extra help. If needed, your pediatrician can recommend additional resources, such as referring you to a mental health provider.
