As human beings, we thrive on making connections with others. And we begin building friendships as children, some of which last a lifetime.
As your child’s friendships grow, they may start asking about sleepovers. But you might wonder how to tell if they’re ready or how to say no.
Let's explore these topics to help navigate this common phase of a child's social development. We'll also offer some sleepover alternatives because not every child (or parent) will be interested in the idea of sleepovers.
How to tell if your child is ready for their first sleepover
Figuring out whether your child is ready for a sleepover can depend on many factors. Their age, emotional readiness, independence and comfort level all play a part.
Here are some questions to ask yourself about your child to help you decide if they're ready:
- Have they expressed an interest in having a sleepover?
- Can they independently do all bedtime tasks, such as brushing their teeth?
- Do they sleep independently in their own bed?
- Do they sleep through the night?
- Do they stay dry throughout the night?
- Are they comfortable being away from you for more than a few hours?
- Do they get along with friends for long periods?
Keep in mind that each child is unique. Having open and honest conversations with them can help you understand their feelings and concerns. Assessing your child’s emotional and social development can help you decide if they’re ready to spend the night away from home.
Your child is ready for sleepovers: Now what?
If you've determined that your child is ready for their first sleepover, you may want to consider hosting at your home first. Being in a familiar and comfortable setting can help your child decide if they want to do it again — and maybe at a friend's house next time. However, if your child is headed to a friend's house for a sleepover, ensuring their safety and well-being is essential.
Here are some important questions to consider asking the host family beforehand:
- Will you be home the entire time?
- Who else will be in the home during the sleepover?
- What type of media/devices do you allow in your home (unrestricted internet or TV access, R-rated movies, social media, etc.)
- Where will the children be sleeping?
- Is there any alcohol, cigarettes, drugs or edibles accessible to the children, or are they locked up?
- Is there a gun in the home? If so, is it locked up?
If you’re not entirely comfortable, you should never hesitate or feel bad declining an invitation. But if you’re comfortable and decide it's a go, having a plan is always a good idea.
Preparing your child for a sleepover
Having a plan can help prepare your child for what to expect and give them the confidence to spend the night away. Remembering these four Cs can help:
- Communicate: Discuss what their night will be like and when you'll return to pick them up. Talk through any concerns they may have.
- Contact: Be sure your child knows who to go to or how to reach you if they become scared or uncomfortable, can't sleep or need to come home.
- Consider: Think about whether your child would benefit from a bedtime phone call or video chat to say goodnight.
- Comfort: If your child has a comfort object they regularly sleep with, such as a stuffed animal or blanket, pack it.
Lastly, ensure you, the host family and your child all know the plan and how to contact each other. Let your child know you're just a phone call away should they need you.
Sleepover alternatives for an unforgettable time with friends
If a traditional sleepover doesn't feel like a good fit for your family, there are many other ways your child can have a fun and treasured experience. Sleep-unders are becoming an increasingly common trend. They can offer the excitement and fun activities of a traditional sleepover but without the actual sleeping over. Everyone returns home at the end of the night to sleep in the comfort of their own homes.
Here are some sleep-under ideas for a sleepover alternative:
- Movie marathon: Hosting a movie night can provide a similar bonding experience to a sleepover. Invite the kids to wear their pajamas and bring their sleeping bags and pillows. If the weather allows, take the movie outdoors. And don’t forget the snacks!
- Pizza and game night: A pizza and game night with friends can be a great alternative that still allows for social interaction. Add to the excitement by inviting friends to bring their favorite game or pizza topping to share. Then, have everyone build their own personal pizzas together before the games begin.
- Dance party: Turn up the volume on some kid-friendly tunes and have a dance party in the living room. You can also bring out a karaoke machine or microphone and have the kids share their singing skills.
- Scavenger hunt and sundaes: A scavenger hunt can add an element of mystery to any get-together. Consider providing clues for different sundae toppings to be found, followed by a build-your-own sundae activity for the kids.
Sleepovers can be exciting for many children, but ensuring your child is emotionally and socially ready for the experience is essential. They also aren't for everyone, and many parents choose to avoid sleepovers altogether. Remember, making memories with friends can be done without spending the entire night away from home. By asking the right questions and exploring alternatives, you can confidently navigate the world of sleepovers while prioritizing your child's well-being and comfort.
