Adoption, foster care, Children's Wi, still smiling
At Every Turn > Foster Care > Foster parents, why are you smiling?
Mar 13, 2017

Foster parents, why are you smiling?

Betsy DuKatz, Foster and Adoptive Parent

Looking back on my childhood, I realize my brothers and I won the Parent Powerball! My mom and dad are high school sweethearts who recently celebrated 50 years of marriage. They raised three children with a dedication to each of them like no other. But as grandparents, they have taken that dedication to a whole new level.

One of my favorite events with my parents and children is a little something we call “Hotel Grandma/Grandpa.” Despite living only 10 miles away and seeing them weekly, a stay at “Hotel G & G” is looked upon with the excitement and anticipation of Christmas morning. Each child gets their turn, with mom, to stay at this luxury hotel for a night. Important details like snacks, flavor of ice cream, movie choice and dinner menu are all set beforehand. For me, the excitement lies in all the “feels” — relaxing in the comfort of my childhood home, the hugs from my mom and dad, their attention and time to talk, a warm meal made with love, comfy blankets and couch snuggles.

Keep your focus

Dear foster parents this is EXACTLY what you all do — child after child. You open your home and become the Parent Powerball for those children. You allow them to be covered in all the “feels” of love, safety, kindness and attention. The children are able to exhale, relax and rely on you — to simply be children. The provisions of couch snuggles, warm meals or a simple snack should never be overlooked or underestimated. You show them every day what love and commitment looks and feels like. The books you read, the bubble bath you run or the countless moments of just listening to them, are each etched on their hearts and minds. Keep your focus on those daily things you do, without much thought, but with great purpose.

The ordinary is really the extraordinary

Recently a good friend of mine (Corin Plucinski) reminded me about focus with one simple question, “Why are you smiling?” This question causes me to stop for a moment, every day, and find an answer — an answer that almost always comes in the memory of something small that I had overlooked. It reminds me again that the small is really the big, and the ordinary is really the extraordinary. The comfort, love, security, reassurance and perseverance we show our children every day is what needs to be focused on and celebrated!

So I ask you, why are YOU smiling?

At any given time, as many as 7,000 children are in foster care in Wisconsin. As the largest provider of foster care programming in the state, Children’s Wisconsin offers high levels of support to foster and adoptive families.  View more articles from Betsy DuKatz

Related stories

Benefits of kids helping in the kitchen Children's Wisconsin
Tips Jun 30, 2025

Little Chefs: The Benefits of Getting Kids Involved in the Kitchen

Lynelle Fischer, APNP Family Nurse Practitioner

Along with modeling health and nutrition, cooking together can teach your child important skills that'll last a lifetime.

Kenzie foster care journey Children's Wisconsin
Patient Stories Jun 24, 2025

My Journey as a Foster Sibling

Kenzie F. Foster Sibling

Kenzie has had 13 foster siblings and each one has brought her family joy.

Helping tweens and teens overcome breakups Children's Wisconsin
Tips Jun 16, 2025

Heartbreak 101: Helping Your Teen Heal After a Breakup

Artie Turner, MS, LPC Behavioral Health Consultant

While it’s painful, there are ways to help your teen navigate through the intense emotions of heartbreak.

How to keep kids hydrated in the summer Children's Wisconsin
Tips Jun 10, 2025

You Can Lead a Kid to Water, but How Do You Get Them To Drink?

Lara Seeby-Halas, MS, LAT Licensed Athletic Trainer

It can be tricky to know how much water kids need — and even trickier to get them to drink it.

Ava and Nova bonded over retinoblastoma MACC Fund Center for Cancer and Blood Disorders at Children's Wisconsin
Patient Stories Jun 04, 2025

Forever Friends: How a Rare Eye Cancer Bonded Two Girls for Life

When two families came to Children's Wisconsin for cancer treatment, they never expected they'd leave with new lifelong friends.

Benefits of gardening with your kids Children's Wisconsin
Tips May 28, 2025

Growing Up Green: The Many Benefits of Gardening With Your Kids

Caitlin Jacobs, MPH, RD, CD Clinical Dietitian

Gardening gets your kids outside, exposes them to a variety of foods and promotes their natural curiosity.